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Last year, on July 20th, 2013, my journey on understanding and dealing with the topic of manhood began. It was that Friday on a hot summer that the episode “Dipper vs. Manliness” on Disney Channel’s “Gravity Falls” went on the air.

Now, a year later, I have a better grasp on what a man really is.

Interestingly enough, even when the Disney Channel series “Kim Possible” was on the air, an episode that stuck with me for a very long time called “Ron the Man” really stuck with me.

It was Ron Stoppable and Dipper Pines who I related to the most in the epic question, “what is a man.” Even just as important, this question, “what kind of man will I be.”

Last year, I wrote an article on the topic of “What Is A Man,” and to be honest, I plan to rewrite that very article.

My Christian counselor and spiritual advisor told me to spend time looking for those “Grace Moments,” where God speaks and is often present, even in places we may not think about.

Dipper’s struggle was no different than mine. He struggled with trying to find his masculinity and his stance as a man on the outside, but it was really deeper than that. It was deeper than chest hair or strength.

For Ron, it was more than about muscles. It was more than about attempting to “look” impressive and gain validation. It was more than a document stating that he was a man from his Bar Mitzvah.

He spoke to me using both of these shows guys! The rest is history!

Stay tuned!

 

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Four-eyes…oh, the many times I’ve been called that! Seriously, who says that anymore!?

Call me whatever you want, but when I put on my glasses and go to work on my laptop, I am in beast mode! And I’m only talking about my moments in blogging or writing.

For me, my glasses are like a construction workers safety goggles.

I have to wear glasses for multiple reasons, one being so I can see well when I read or work on the computer (I’ll explain more in Part 2 of this blog series regarding what happened one late night in a local NBC Newsroom regarding my computer and my eyesight).

I recall wearing square framed glasses during my elementary school years. I was picked on a LOT for wearing, well, everything that touched my skin. I didn’t wear name-brand clothing so I was a target, daily!

By Jr. High, I didn’t need glasses anymore. My eyesight, as the eye-doctor said, improved!

I celebrated with a victory dance in that doctor’s office. You would have thought that I won the lottery. I mean, come on! I was about 12 years old and the last thing I needed other than annoying voice change issues and awkward moments were a pair of glasses.

Not wearing glasses during my middle school or high school years turned out okay. Even during college! But, one late night at KFOR-TV changed everything!

Main set at Oklahoma's NewsChannel 4, NBC station KFOR-TV in Oklahoma City, OK.

Main set at Oklahoma’s NewsChannel 4, NBC station KFOR-TV in Oklahoma City, OK.

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“I’m such a genius!”

“I know so many things!”

“Adults and older individuals surround me, filled with awe and are surprised over my maturity and focus at such a young age. I can’t stopped!”

“I’m so much better than my peers!”

OK, now, everything that’s listed above here is just DISGUSTING!!!

This is what we call “pride!” I walked around feeling this way for a long, long time, partly because of what I went through as a kid and partially as an adult and yet part of me knew I needed to keep it in check.

Lately, I have been re-reading “Checkpoints: A Tactical Guide to Manhood” by Brian Mills and Nathan Wagnon and a very powerful quote from C.S. Lewis had me thinking about my issues:

“the more we have it ourselves, the more we dislike it in others.”

Now, I’ve worked with enough youth and deal with enough people, from family to co-workers on a daily basis, that seem to have the biggest pride and ego issues.

And its irritating.

The individuals that walk around like pompous know-it-all’s who THINK they really know what they are talking about but really can’t tell you what’s up from down…man, annoying!

Ouch…that WAS me. The difference between me and the other guy is that I’m blessed with the opportunity and the courage to be able to admit it! That’s nobody but God…otherwise, I would’ve played that role like an actor.

During elementary school, I was in special ed and struggled with relating to kids my age. What little dignity and self-respect I had for myself was nearly gone.

By jr. high and high school, things changed!

My grades began to spike! I was actually becoming somewhat popular. I was becoming the “perfect model” of a young man both in my church and in my school.

While I knew it was nobody but the Lord that brought me from such a low point in life to a much higher place, I found myself struggling with something for a while — pride!

I got intoxicated over the attention.

I used the attention to try and cover up other issues I had, issues that now can be dealt with in my adult life.

So, what’s the point!

The point is that so many of us are walking around with this idea that we are owed something! We walk around feeling like the world must pay us back! My reason for feeling this way…I was hurt! I was confused about my life in some aspects! I wanted so badly for things to go my way, just once, because my enemies seemed to have the upperhand.

Last night, I was in tears, thanking Jesus for snapping me out of such nonsense so long ago and cleaning me up now to remove remnants of my selfishness and pride.

I really deserved death, but instead, was given life!

RANDY CUNNINGHAM: 9TH GRADE NINJA – “Last Stall On The Left” – Freshman Randy Cunningham discovers the ‘NinjaNomicon’ – an 800 year old Ninja guide – which reveals that he has been chosen to be Norrisville’s newest Ninja. Armed with his magic ninja suit, he faces his first battle with McFist’s monster Krakenstein while juggling his new secret identity and being there for his best friend Howard in a special sneak preview of “Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja,” MONDAY, AUGUST 13 (9:00 – 9:15 p.m., ET/PT) on Disney XD. (DISNEY XD)
RANDY

Randy Cunningham’s problem with knowledge is much like ours.

The temptation is there ( and certainly was for me ) to pretend to know everything when truth of the matter was I didn’t know at all. You fear that if you don’t act like you “know” and if you don’t “fake it till you make it” so to speak, you come off looking really stupid.

If you think you are full of knowledge, then great, but really think about what that means. Knowledge in Webster’s Dictionary is defined as “facts, information and skills acquired by a person through experience or through education.” It is also defined as “awareness or familiarity gained by experience of a fact or situation.”

Proverbs 1:7 says “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge: fools despise wisdom and instruction.”

King Solomon wrote Proverbs 1:7 and in it made the point that the fear, or revering and trusting of the Lord is beginning, or start of knowledge. Knowledge starts when one understands that everything in them and around them is not about them, but about what God Himself is doing and going to do in your life and others.

But keep reading…we see that “fools despise wisdom and instruction.” The term “fools” here is characterized as someone who would be “dull” and “closed minded.” These type of individuals are those who are “hard-headed” and “stubborn.” Because of this type of mindset, fools reject information from others, whether they agree with it or not.

Sounds like Randy in this episode, right!? Actually, it sounds like a lot of us.

Just this past week, I spoke to a friend over the phone and told him to get over himself. I told him that he would not go forward untill he got himself right with God. Unfortunately, many of us think that God owes us a favor when truth of the matter is His Grace alone is His “unmerited” favor. We can’t do anything to earn it and we really don’t deserve it! But that’s a whole other sermon!

Its great to be smart and learn about different things in and around you, but ultimately, your knowledge starts with a relationship with God and Christ Jesus. You can learn tons about the world, but you’ll need more than knowledge of facts, you’ll need knowledge that’s grounded by Faith.

"Ken" on "Ministry Minutes" (c) Kendall Lyons, 2012

"Ken" on "Ministry Minutes" (c) Kendall Lyons, 2012

In order to properly continue the discussion of the topic of “Bullying” on Cartoon Daily News this week, I chose to share a message that I preached about a year ago.

It was not too long ago that I had the pleasure of being able to preach at the Oakcliff, Texas Baptist Ministers Union Revival during a weekend Youth Night service. My sermon topic was “How To Handle Your Bullies” and I gave at least three points as I preached out of 1 Samuel 17, the story of David and Goliath. The thoughts from the sermon were as follows:

1.) Know Your Identity

Often times, the one who is bullied will experience a low level of self-esteem and self-respect. Imagine, the kid who might not be the tallest, the smartest, the bravest, the most popular, the most liked and the list goes on. Even the bully is behaving like a “bully” for a reason! Often times its because they may think, without truly realizing it sometimes, that it gives them some kind of edge or power of that person. Bullies have an identity issue themselves too. They often desire respect, but lack the proper way of earning that respect. Those who are bullied, the victim, either responds in fear and desires not to tell anyone except someone they can trust or someone they are close too, or, try and take drastic and seriously consequential measures to deal with the bully themselves.

In 1 Samuel 17, David was just a boy who cared for his father’s sheep, but he knew of the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. He knew of the God that created all things. He knew of the God that created Him. His family gave him everything needed to have a basic and foundational standing of his identity. This becomes obvious when he later makes his way to the battlefield where his brothers are located and volunteers himself to fight against the giant, Goliath.

Know that God has equipped you with everything you need and that you have the resources to do what is necessary. If you are having issues with a bully, know you have adults and others in authority you can trust who will help with the situation.

Also, keep in mind that you might be a target for bullies simply because you are being exactly who you are supposed to be, YOURSELF! People get jealous. People get angry. People hate! Why, because you refuse to follow what’s popular, cool or trendy to everyone else!

2.) Know Your Purpose

You’re on a mission. Who has time to fight, fuss and argue with people over things that you’ll forget and things that don’t even matter. You were created for a purpose, on purpose! Bullies are, in a way, lacking in purpose and identity and the only way they know how to get what they think they want is to push others around. For those who are being bullied, know that you do not have to be a constant victim. Stand up and speak out! For those of you who have been bullied in the past, this is your chance to stand up and speak out. You may be the one that someone else is needing to hear. Fulfill your purpose in that brief moment of opportunity!

3.) Know The Lord

Certainly you saw this coming…after all, I am a minister! This article would not meet quality standards if I didn’t tell you that in a relationship with Christ, you indeed have victory! The bully and bullied can walk away from confrontation with one another and be at peace, knowing that they were created by a creator that knows them, loves them and wants them to be in a place in life that they have life more abundantly. Stop focusing on the problem, and start focusing on the solution! Hope is not lost!

God has blessed you with the people, the resources and the place to stop bullying, and, for that matter, to stop many things that are happening around you.

Will you speak up!?